my calling card reads: doing what i want since 2008. yes, that is true. doing what i want took years of preparation way back to childhood. my mother started it, somehow creating independence and doing what i wanted w/in a very controlled family environment. 4 kids left little room for doing what any of us wanted to do. she bought my clothes, decided on my haircut, etc. parents moved us from the city of mansfield to the next village down the state highway of lucas which was farming and became a labor pool for industry in mansfield. lucas’ school system was what a rural community could support. my parents were both college grads and believer of study hard, get good grades, get into a good college, then get a good job. to that end they decided to pay tuition for each of us to attend mansfield schools starting in 9th grade. i was the first to go. our family was scorned by the locals as being too good for them. living in a rural community meant school bus rides and no after school events or hanging around. our new location was in the country about .5 miles above the village, close enough to walk home to lunch, eat, and walk back before the bell. we had 15 acres, 9 of woods and 6 of grass w/ farmland around us. i was in my element that i recreated outside by myself. i learned about nature and being outside year round. i was a boy scout. i attended 1 week summer camp never w/ any inkling of being homesick. my 13th summer camp an adult scouter spoke at lunch 1 day talking about an opportunity to go from a boy to a man by attending philmont scout ranch in new mexico. i wanted in. i wanted to go but was afraid to ask my dad’s permission and funding for fear he would reject me. he said yes under the condition i earned life rank. philmont would be next year when i was 14, min age. i was in, i knew none of the scouters which was no deterrent: i wanted to go. i was just an ohio kid that had never seen a mountain. the spring before leaving i was severely injured in a car wreck as a passenger. my parents were on a business trip leaving us in care of a woman and her daughter. shortening the story, i was transported by ambulance to mansfield hospital. my parents arrived late the next day. i had no wanting my parents to help me. i spent 2 weeks in the hospital breathing thru a tube in my neck. i healed up to experience philmont. the leader stated many times to us and parents for the mothers to kiss their boys one last time as when they return they will be men and you will shake their hand. i tried to escape that last kiss. philmont exposed me to mountains and backpacking. 1964 was my year.

i had learned it was easier to do what i wanted  w/o negotiating / convincing others to go along. 2 summers i worked for the usfs in the umpqua nf in oregon. the 2nd summer, 1970, i was part of a 12 man intraregional fire suppression crew. i was in oregon for 83 days and worked for 81. our crew spent 33 days on fires. i flew in helicopters, i dug fire line w/ 1 foot in the fire. what a summer.  i was tested and passed. i was confident in myself.

my life’s experiences prepared my do embark on my odyssey. i am able to take care of myself and could trust others to help me when needed. to date i have been twice transported by ambulance to hospitals for accident repair. i survived w/ the help of people i did not know. i did not have a home support network. i had no friends to call upon for support. exception being my stay in spokane, my last home town, back in sept ’13 for the previous shoulder repair.

what i have been saying is i have been in preparation for this adventure since i was a tyke back in ohio. the longest journey starts w/ the first step. i knew that canada was lots of steps north from that night i slept at the mexican border back in ’78 at the start of my solo pct thru hike.

the oxycodone is wearing off and my cold is being successfully purged by my body. i have been staying out @ beaverhead for 3 days away from people to not expose them to this and to spare them of many horrible coughing fits that would have expelled me from my rented room. i am able to raise and lower my bed w/ little or no strain to my right arm. i take an oxy before bed attempting to block the pain. i understand to successfully manage my surgical pain that i need to be on them 24 hours.  i am thinking that today i will retrieve my stuff from her house as my van suits me now. i have made oatmeal last 2 mornings and cleaned up my mess. dinner requires too much 2 hand work so i will continue to dine out.

i got booted from the shop because of my cold, i wasn’t allowed to share my expelled virus. (whatever’s plural). chest wracking coughs forces up goop to be swallowed.

yesterday i drove up to west sedona top do my wash and fill the percocet script.

last night i drove out to the overlook for the night. started out by myself. before i went to bed a large rv rentak rig pulled. not my friends. i crawled into bed and fell asleep. i was awakened later to rain pounding on the roof and a bright light shining around. i crawled out of bed to learn thne light source as a man was packing stuff onto a backpack, the light was like a lantern hooked to his belt. he headed out in the rain.

i ate 1 percocet b4 bed. pain seemed to be about the same. i am able to sleep on my left side while using the bolster pillow from the sling to prop up my right arm which takes pain away. temp dropped to lower 40s. i turned on the furnace which started on the 3rd start cycle. i woke up several times to see the flashing red led meaning it didn’t start. it did restart.

today i stayed at the overlook till late afternoon. coughing. hacking. i sat in the driver’s seat reading kingsolver. mid afternoon i walked following cow path to camp spot 1st past over look. the road in was blocked by a hazardous road condition because of the muddy bog. i walked the road to my favorite spot to check it out. road withstood the rain allowing a non muddy approach. i walked back to overlook then drove back to favorite spot. i’m here for the night.

i haven’t been sleeping well because of surgery pain and the hacking cough. may i wake up tomorrow w/o the cough.

my voice is horribly affected by the cough, i can’t tell stories.

early this week a tickle in my throat took  up residence. i gargled w/ hot salty h20 several times which would make the environment less hospital to little effect. wed i awoke w/ a chest cold and hacking. my vocal cords are hoarse. the hack added to the surgery pain that the med strength doesn’t block made for poor sleeping.

i sleep propped up w/ the bed rest memory foam pillow. to date this position produced the least pain. my cold has caused me to be banned from bean. last night i hung in my house behind red agave till i wanted to go to bed. i left just after 9. oopps, i’ll arrive while the house is still up and able to judge me and my cold. i pictured her emotionally demanding me to leave. i’d have to walk back to van, 15n mins away. i dallied trying to make arrival past 10. i couldn’t do it. i needed my pillow for this bed. quandary. no pillow. i texted her to say i wouldn’t be her place because of my cold. and most importantly my bed is waiting for me to do a solo. success! i lowered the bed w/ just my good arm requiring little braking pressure. i propped my foam and regular bed pillows behind my head hoping for a good prop. no such luck. i tried on my back which turned out to still be painful. therapist told me that shoulder stretches will help cure this source of pain. i rolled onto my left side and started positioning pillows. i actually found the painless arrangement of my body and pillows. i’ll try that in the house bed tonight.

this am i was able to stow the bed for running, again 1 handed helped w/ a body nudge. bfast is 2 pieces of buttered toast w/ local honey and a cup of cold brewed coffee. i am able to prepare this using just my left arm. i am putting off active cooking and follow on cleanup.

i drove to the bean and stood outside and asked jimmy if i received mail. he checked the box where the new pain script waited.

i drove to west sedona to do wash and fill the script percocet. christy folded my 3 shirts after i buttoned them.

back at bean. weather is unsettled like a march day. it’s chilly.

yesterday during the day i drove out to beaverhead to see whatever and hang out till dinner time. a local told me he parked his trailer @ my favorite spot for 2 weeks. he said vandals stole a camper battery. windy and sunny. i am reading barbara kingsolver’s new book. flight behavior. lots of words that say a lot makes for toothy reading. i chose to stay out of the wind by reading at my table. phil drove up to run his dogs. he put an electronic collar on 2 of the runaway dogs the got back in his rig and drove off. he sits while the dogs get it on.

reality is a bike shop is in business that makes money. the staff is occupied w/ their jobs. seems the shop culture is one line put downs. i never learned game. i have always sought knowledge as my conversation that meant way more than the waste of time put downs. people outside the store are where it’s at. the shop brings them in and i maybe score some face time.

today is surgery plus 3 weeks. pt starts on 4/18, 2 weeks hence. the sling is cast off 4 more weeks. i made an excell spread sheet for the recovery. happy path will be to leave here early june.

alaska trip fizzled again.